TODAY ON SOCIAL MEDIA | ARE BLACK WOMEN THE MOST DISRESPECTED

Recently, a popular question on social media grabbed my attention. There I was on my daily scroll, and it caught me by surprise. Which was shocking because, this was not the first time I heard it. During numerous interactions, It'll always randomly pop in various discussions. But instead of them leading to an answer, the question was smothered by confusion. After searching as a panelist, I decided to get away and observe. Then I finally found an answer to social media's most popular question "Are Black women the most disrespected"

Early on in my study, I hit a wall during my search. Because two more questions came to mind. “What are black women blamed for the most” and “Who are their accusers”. I found myself going down a rabbit hole searching for the answers. I quickly realized statistics alone wouldn't help. Because although they do provide great insight, they still leave the two questions unaddressed. So I had to search outside of the box. I turned to social media for data, and the study revealed that black women are always chestized in these conversations. In every discussion about this topic, they’re blamed for being sexually irresponsible, single mothers, and for letting the government divide their family.

The accusations seemed like an ambush attack on black women. It created an urgency to bring a conclusion to this matter, I’m not opposed to holding anyone accountable for their actions. But black women didn't create these predicaments by themselves. Therefore, it’s not fair to solely blame them. These scenarios were a team effort. The men at the scene of the crime are just as guilty, and should equally be held accountable for their contribution. If a black woman is sexually irresponsible, then so are the men who sleep with them. If a black woman is wrong for being a single mother, then so are the fathers who allowed that. If a black woman is wrong for choosing government assistance, then so are the fathers who put them in that situation. All points considered, those accused deserve some level of grace. Unfortunately that is nonexistent in most of these conversations.

As I continued to research, the facts become more and more harder to process. Because

a deeper dive into the study, uncovered something that was more concerning. To make matters worst, this concern fact was hiding in plain site. But during my experience as a panelist, I was too distracted by the engagement to notice it. I was more focused on contributing to the conversation, instead of who was speaking in the conservation. When I got away from the noise, the disturbing details were exposed. In these conversations, I saw who the harsh, heinous, and ungraceful accusations were coming from. They were all shot like bullets, from the mouths of Black Men. That kind of misogyny shows a lack of respect for black women.

It highlighted that a vast majority of black men have a toxic unwritten rule. They live by a bro code, that’s detrimental to the black community. They go on tour blaming black women for scenarios, that black men help to create. Not understanding the hypocrisy in their stance. Furthermore, it’s equivalent to Adam blaming eve for eating the fruit. Although eve was wrong, Adam failed to be accountable for his lack of leadership. It’s a cautionary that every black man should consider. God held them both accountable for failing. The same must be done in this conversation. Every black man’s lack of accountability, tells black women “I don’t respect you enough to be better, or demand better from our men”. Like Adam, there’s a chain reaction to that. It forces black women to not trust our men. Furthermore, it forces them into a role they were never meant to play. It forces them to be tough. It forces them to prioritize their protection. It forces them to be independent. It forces broken homes.

This answers the million dollar question. Black Women are the most disrespected, by Black men. I’m not saying two wrongs make a right here. I’m saying that when a black man fails to do right, it has a domino effect for the entire black community. Black women are not without fault. But black men failing to lead by example is a bigger part of the problem. If Adam led by example, humanity would be better off. We’d have heaven on earth. In the same way, If more black men lead by accountability, we’d see better from our women.

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